


More

by juliesioux



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Felicity Smoak POV, Green Arrow - Freeform, Love, Missing Scene, Overwatch - Freeform, Passion, Sex, Soulmates, True Love, olicity - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 11:40:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14471979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juliesioux/pseuds/juliesioux
Summary: This was meant to be a bridging scene that helps set the stage for what the show is doing with Oliver and Felicity between 619 and 620. I wanted to explore Felicity's POV because of the hurt and loss she must feel in having Oliver take from her something that she helped create: namely the mission, her identity as Overwatch and the bunker.I am not at all a fan of this storyline. I really feel like the writers have completely let us down and let Felicity down as they write themselves into a corner with this nonsensical bullshit.I would have preferred a Smoak Tech storyline but here we are...





	More

**More**

_He stepped carefully_

_over the edges_

_of her Universe._

 

Oliver was in the shower, rinsing the remains of the night off of his skin. His clothes, left on the floor in a formless heap, smelled musty, smoky and felt oily with the residue of death once more avoided. Felicity sat on the edge of their bed, still in her coat and dress, and stared at them. She could have sworn she saw thin tendrils of smoke rising from them, indications of the danger he had managed to avoid.

Reflexively, her fingers tightened on the duvet. She felt shattered, the pieces of her heart and soul were flying under her skin, crashing together as they searched for cracks to escape through. There was a rising panic in her chest, causing her vision to blur, tears slid unheeded down her cheeks and her heart began to pound in a frantic staccato beat. She curled around the pain in her body, trying to keep the scream that was threatening to burst out of her buried deep inside.

Turning around she laid down face first into the closest pillow just as the wail she had been trying to stifle, flew out of her, wild and uncontrolled. She hadn’t done this since she was a teenager, when she wrestled with the weight of so much expectation at university and the loneliness that being a young genius placed on her shoulders.

Drawing her knees up to her chest, she let the fear and terror at thinking that she lost Oliver forever out in a long howl. When she heard the explosion in the remnants of the Glades, she had felt instantly ill. Oliver was in the middle of it and every cell in her body was screaming at the thought of him perishing in the violence and fire.

He had tried to calm her but that only made her panic and fear intensify. The helplessness, the terror, the way her world had started to disintegrate and splinter with every step it took to get here, to their home, had left her shaking. Being able to touch him, to feel him in her arms should have calmed her down but it didn’t. She had felt bereft andabandoned, even as he promised her that he would always come home, the loneliness of her youth came roaring back and she lost her grip on their life.

The trembling she had thought gone had returned. Her entire body was shaking and a cold sweat broke out all over her body. The idea of losing him this soon left a cold finger of fear buried deep in her heart. It spread into an icy grip and she wailed, pressing her face further into the pillow hoping it was swallowing her misery.

The bed moved under her and a pair of strong arms pulled her up from the pillow. She kept her legs drawn up, held them tight to her chest and heard her own voice crying out in one long, sustained wail. She pushed at him, not wanting the comfort he was offering and shook head in a vehement answer of, “No!”.

Oliver held her tight, not giving her the freedom she was shoving him away to find. She felt her glasses being removed from her face and a gentle tug at her hair band sent her hair cascading down her back in long waves that Oliver loved so much. But still she pushed against him, sobbing out her rage and sorrow. The combined pain of helplessness, frustration and a fear so deep it felt rooted to her soul.

“Felicity,” his voice full of agonized regret in her ear, “please...please stop crying.”  
“Let me go,” she whispered with one final shove against his chest.

Finally, his arms loosened from around her and she was able to get the space she needed to breathe. Curling up again, she buried her face in her arms and took deep, gulping breaths, flooding her body with much needed oxygen. Closing her eyes, she focused on the way she released each breath like Oliver taught her and slowly, she calmed down.

“Can you get me some Kleenex?” she asked from behind her arms.

The bed shifted and Oliver made his way silently into their bathroom. She heard the water tap go on and the opening of drawers while he looked for the tissues. She thought she heard the tap being turned and the sound of running water but the rain hammering on their bedroom window overtook it. Keeping herself curled around the hurt, she waited until the bed moved under Oliver’s weight before moving her arms so she could reach out her hand. Softly, Oliver placed the tissues in her hand and waited.

Raising her head up, Felicity wiped her face and blew her nose before saying, “I must look like some kind of scary clown.”  
“No, love, no,” he said sadly, “You will always look beautiful to me.”  
“I know you are trying to be kind, but I know I am a mess,” she sniffled.  
“Have some water,” he said gently, hesitantly holding out a glass of water.

Gratefully, she took the water from him and drank it. She had cried herself hoarse while he was in the shower and then wailed her voice almost completely away. Her eyes felt puffy and raw and while she had yet to look in a mirror, she knew her face was smeared with make up and probably flushed a bright red.

Oliver sat silently opposite her. He made no move to touch her or attempt to comfort her and it was breaking the last pieces of her heart. She could feel the fear and uncertainty vibrating out of him but his breathing was slow and controlled. He was keeping his heartbeat steady and his body calm while he waited for her to decide what happened next.

“Oliver,” she started slowly, “I can’t do this.”  
“This…?” his voice croaked out of him and she felt the surge of fear that accompanied the one word he spoke.  
“I mean waiting out here, out of the bunker, waiting to see if you are alive or dead at the end of the night,” she said quickly, “I thought I lost you tonight.”  
“But you didn’t. I am right here.”

He was determined for her to accept this current situation and she was trying but her resolve had weakened. He was out on the street alone. No backup, no help from her, just him in harm’s way without any assistance from her. Tonight, as she watched the news and smelled the acrid scent of smoke on the air, she had never felt more helpless in her life.

“You are but you aren’t,” she said softly, “You are keeping me out, forbidding me even a small view, of a life we shared. You, not me. And when I tried to tell you...you dismissed my concerns. You made me feel...like how I feel doesn’t matter. That what I have to offer, doesn’t matter.”

“Felicity...I...that,” he faltered and sat back on the bed. He was staring at a point above her head, deep in thought, but his eyes had a faraway look of someone lost to everything around him. She could feel his isolation but it was self imposed and she was beginning to get angry at his constant withdrawal.

“Oliver, you pushed me out of the lair, the one I built, and now, when you are home, you aren’t present. You aren’t here,” she said with heat singeing every consonant and vowel, “You are drifting away from me, retreating to the place you started when you came back from Lian Yu.”  
“I explained that I need to focus on the mission and only the mission. I can’t let anything get in the way of that,” he said with forced patience.

Her eyes snapped up to his, locking them together, and she all but hissed, “You are the one who made the point, repeatedly, that my voice in your ear guiding you, keeping you safe, was part of that mission. You, Oliver. You are the one who pulled me and John into your mission because you knew you couldn’t do it alone. But now, all of a sudden, I am not good enough to continue as Overwatch.”

He was fidgeting with the towel he still had wrapped around his waist. His shoulders were set though, she could tell he was building his defense of his decision, readying for the argument that was ready to burst into fiery life between them. He was determined to hold his position even if that meant fighting with her.

“That isn’t it, Felicity. I need to keep my worlds separate. I can’t risk losing sight of the mission and that is stopping Diaz. I can’t trust or rely on John or the others, I can only rely on myself.”  
“But you can’t trust me? Or rely on me?” she tried to keep the hurt and shock out of her voice but failed. She blinked rapidly to clear her eyes of tears and gripped the pillow in her hands.

“I need you with William,” he said simply, his voice flat and emotionless.  
“William has his grandparents, he has Thea, he has people who he can turn to now but I need you,” she kept her voice low but she wanted to shout at him, to crash his carefully constructed world with the power of her voice, “You don’t get to decide for me what I need, Oliver. I am not just a guardian of your son. Or an employee. I am your wife, Oliver, and just as importantly, I am your partner.”

He focused his eyes on her and she was saddened by what she saw within them or rather, what was missing. There was no warmth in them, no depth. He was regarding her carefully, warily and it ignited a rage in her that she knew had to be dealt with.

“Oliver,” she said through clenched teeth, “when I joined your original mission, I wasn’t sure where it would take me. I was just going to stay on until Walter was rescued but something changed in me. Your mission ceased to be YOUR mission the minute you shook my hand. You have no right pushing me out of the bunker and removing me from what I built alongside you, what helped give my life, our life, purpose.”

His eyes narrowed as he listened to her. With a quick shake of his head, he said, “No, Felicity, those days are done. This is about my mission. My job as Green Arrow.”  
“How many times have you said to me that I am the one who saved you over and over in the field?” she asked angrily.  
“That’s not the point,” he started, “You have your company. You have a purpose beyond Overwatch.”  
“And beyond you? Is that how little you think of me and how I contribute?” her rage was giving way to a profound sense of loss.

He was being so dismissive and condescending and she had nothing to counter it. Defeat rolled over her. Getting angry would serve no purpose, arguing with him would only prolong the inevitable: that she had to accept his decision and stay out of the bunker.

Shaking her head, she lowered it again to rest on her arms. Wave after wave of helplessness rolled over her and it was all she could do to not start crying again. He wasn’t listening to her but more importantly, he had no real desire to hear what she was trying to say. In the past she would have left the room, she would have gone to get some air but that required energy and she was fresh out.

“Felicity,” he said quietly, “there was never supposed to be anyone in the bunker with me. That is something I need to get back to.”  
“Vertigo told you that. Your guilty conscience told you that. You have grown so far past that man. You are so much more than the Hood and a lot of that is because of John and I. You can’t ignore that.”  
“I know and appreciate that,” he said slowly, enunciating each word, “but my mind is made up.”

Felicity lifted her head and stared at Oliver. He looked like a stranger and not the soulmate she knew him to be. Panic rose up in her chest and tears spilled down her cheeks. This was not supposed to be happening. He was going out into the field alone, with no back up and without her on comms. She had no idea where he was or if he was safe when he was out in the dark Star City night and he was keeping her in the dark on purpose.

“Felicity,” his voice cracked around the edges, “I know you feel like you aren’t contributing...helping me but you are. Just in a different way.”  
“No, Oliver, I’m not. I am terrified you aren’t going to come back one night and I could have prevented it by being in the bunker. I can’t...I won’t survive that, Oliver,” she whispered, her voice broken, shattered by his refusal to include her.

They sat in silence, staring at each other in a room that suddenly felt cold and unfamiliar. Felicity wasn’t sure what she wanted to do. If she wanted to get up off the bed and leave or reach for him, trying to find solace in his touch. Instead, with a growing sense of loneliness, she sat in stillness, focusing on her breathing to keep her calm.

“Do you really think I have no use for you?” his voice was small, hesitant and profoundly sad to her ears, “Do you not realize I only want to keep you safe?”  
“You are taking from me something that you have no right to. Not now, not ever. You are taking away my choice, Oliver, my right to choose,” she said sadly, knowing he wasn’t listening.

“I am exercising mine,” was all he said.

With a deep sigh, Felicity got up and took off her jacket. She had slipped out of her shoes earlier and now wanted only to be comfortable and buried under the duvet but she picked up her pajamas and headed to the bathroom. She needed a shower and some time to centre her thoughts and try to find a way for them to communicate.

Pausing but not turning around, she said, “This isn’t just about me needing to be part of the mission, Oliver, it is about you respecting my right to decide what is good for me. I love you, which means you can’t push me out and hide what you do from me. That isn’t what marriage means.”

With that, she did something she hadn’t done with him once in their relationship, married or not. She closed the bathroom door and quietly turned the lock. She was shaking, adrenaline surging through her body, and she made her way to the bathtub and sat down. Taking deep breaths, ones that reached all the way down to her toes, Felicity pulled herself slowly together, piece by shaking piece.

What she needed was a shower. A hot, sudsy shower to relax her body and calm the ache in her heart. Oliver wasn’t hearing her. He had put a wall around himself as Green Arrow and as a result had created what was becoming an insurmountable distance. He hadn’t been like this since deciding to leave and face Ra’s Al Ghul. The thought of that, the outcome and all the grief and pain that followed, hit her like a sledgehammer.

With trembling fingers, Felicity stripped out of her dress and stepped into the hot shower. It felt good to let the water run over her head and down her body. She closed her eyes and imagined all the stress and tension flowing out of her but the tears came nonetheless, cleansing her heart as they fell. She felt the ache of sorrow in every atom of her body and hoped that by the time she was ready to rejoin him in their bed, that she could breathe without feeling the damn holding it back was ready to burst.

When the water started to cool, she turned it off and wrapped herself in a towel. Rubbing the mirror over the sink with a hand towel, she studied her reflection. Her eyes were clear and bright but puffy. She looked depressed and withdrawn, defeated and alone. With a sigh, she put on her pajamas, unlocked the bathroom door and re-entered their bedroom.

Oliver was in bed, silent and still. She could see from the way he was breathing, slow but shallow, that he wasn’t asleep. Turning off the bathroom light, she made her way to her side of the bed and carefully crawled between the cool, crisp sheets and turned her back on him, seeking solace in the rain streaked windows facing her.

Exhaustion caught up with her and her eyes closed. She didn’t want to go to sleep angry but they were at an impasse and until they could find their way to some kind of understanding that didn’t involve her giving up what was important to her, she had nothing left to give or say.

Darkness descended and with it came a dreamless sleep. She was lost in the inky depths of her subconscious when the shift of the bed roused her. Slowly, she became aware of Oliver and his eyes on her. She tried to find her way back to sleep but the longer she was aware of him, the farther away sleep drifted. The only way to know what was happening, was to turn over and find out.

So that is what she did.

Oliver’s eyes were hooded and dark. His face was set in a neutral expression, unreadable and isolating. She was in bed with the man she loved more than life itself but she was entirely alone. Even if she reached out to him, she was certain he would disappear, her fingers passing through him, disrupting only air.

“Hey,” he said softly.  
“Hey” she answered, remaining on her side of the bed.  
“What are we going to do?”  
“You need to believe in me, like I believe in you,” she whispered.  
“I do believe in you,” he said sadly. “More than anyone else in the world.”  
“Then stop shutting me out. You know what marriage means to me and this isn’t it,” she said wearily, pulling the duvet up to her chin.

Oliver’s face was hidden in the darkness of the room but she knew he was regarding her carefully. She wanted him to reach out, to find her in the darkness like he was so good at doing but he was keeping his hands and himself from her on purpose. Tears threatened to fall again the longer she thought about it, so with a quiet sigh, she shut her heart away.  
“If anything happened to you because of what I do as the Green Arrow, it would be the end of me,” he said so softly she almost didn’t hear him, “and in order to find Diaz and stop him, I need you to be safe so that I can focus.”  
“You don’t understand, Oliver,” she said, defeated and tired, “you only hear the voice in your head and not what I am saying.”

She moved to turn over and try to find sleep again but he stopped her with a soft touch on her face. Felicity froze. Her entire body started to shake as his fingertips traced her face and ran the length of her neck. Neither one of them moved closer to the other but she felt his heart trying to find its way back to her.

“Oliver, when you are out on the streets without me keeping track of your movements and the movements of the men who are trying to kill you...I can’t breathe. I can’t function. I am not handling this well and it is killing me.”  
“Felicity...I don’t know how to make this better…,” Oliver paused to collect his thoughts, “I never meant to make you feel that I was pushing you out. I was...I am trying to protect you and I know that you feel that you don’t need it. How about this, as a compromise, let me try this for a week. If I get hurt or fail to catch Diaz, I will bring you back into the bunker.”

She thought about it for a few minutes. He was going to do it regardless of what she answered so she formulated a plan. It didn’t lessen the hurt how he was controlling the world they used to share, that he was regressing beyond her ability to reach. She loved him and was terrified that this might be it, that this decision was the one that would take him away from her forever.

“I understand you think this is the best way forward, and I know you will do it regardless of my answer so I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” she asked.  
“I don’t know how else to do this, Felicity,” he said helplessly.  
“You could have included me. You are my husband,” her voice wavered as she spoke the words, “but you fired me. From a job that wasn’t yours to take in the first place. I love you. I love you with all that I have within me and you know that, so the pain of you deliberately doing the one thing you promised me you never would, after telling me you couldn’t do this without me, Oliver...if I ever lost you…”

Tears began to flow as she let her mind drift to a life thought Oliver. It was unfathomable, unthinkable. She felt the hollow loneliness in her chest and closed her eyes. She needed him to understand this in a way that made him feel as helpless and powerless as she did right in that moment.

“Remember how it felt when I went with Helix and left the team?” she asked.  
“Yes,” he murmured, “I do remember that.”  
“Remember how helpless you felt as I closed you out? As I made my way without you?” she asked, “We can’t go back to that, Oliver, we made a commitment to each other. You need to trust me.”  
“I do trust you, Felicity, I don’t trust the men I am hunting.”  
“So here we are at the impasse again,” she sighed and tried to pull away.

Oliver moved across the enormous bed so that he was inches from her. She felt the conflicting energy between them. There was so much love and desire radiating off of them but there was also hesitancy and a sad longing that was wrapping itself around their hearts. She kept her hands wrapped around the duvet to keep from reaching out to him.

“Felicity,” he said, his voice low and full of regret, “give me a week, ok? Let me try to do this. Please.”  
“But what is something happens to you? Oliver…,” she stopped and looked at him. His eyes were luminous, clear and focused on her, watching her closely and carefully.  
“We’ll deal with it, like we always do,” he said gently, brushing her hair out of her face, “but one thing I can deal with right now is to tell you that you have saved me so many times while I was out on patrol, more times than I can count or ever thank you for. You became the backbone and eyes of every operation. I fell in love with you because of that, you guided me to safety, you made me a better man, a better human being. But I need to do this.”

She closed her eyes and thought it through. He was resolute and determined to do this his way. When Oliver got like this, he was immovable. They were both stubborn and obstinate when they dug in their heels but right now, she was not wrong. He was being dismissive but it was a defense mechanism. One that he needed to feel comfortable to continue with his decision to push her out.

The only problem was, she had no idea if that meant being pushed out into the light or back into darkness. Tentatively, she reached out and gently cupped his face. Feeling his skin provided comfort, she loved the way the roughness of his beard would give way to the silky smoothness of his cheeks. Bit by bit, her defenses dissolved, this was a fight she couldn’t win yet, but she loved the man beside her more than her desire to be right at the expense of their relationship.

“One week,” was all she said.  
“One week,” he whispered.  
“Oliver, keep me informed. Please.”  
“Okay, I will keep you up to date. I know it feels like I am keeping you out in the cold but I promise, I won’t do that,” he whispered softly.

Felicity stroked his cheek and felt the warm wetness of his tears. It broke her heart to think of the pain they were both carrying.

“Oliver, I love you, no matter what. Even if I don’t always agree with you but please, don’t leave me to wonder where you are or what you are doing if you can avoid it,” she was trying to keep the begging out of her voice and knew she was failing, “I need you to promise me you will try.”  
“I promise, Felicity,” he said with such tentative care that she could feel it, “I never want you to worry.”

He pulled her hand up to his lips and gently kissed the inside of her wrist. The softness of his lips was so familiar and seductive, it was all she could do to not slip closer to him. She felt the rush of his breath over her knuckles as he entwined their fingers. His hands engulfed hers yet she felt so strong when they did this, like they could conquer the world just by holding hands. The gentle brush of his thumb over hers sent a shiver down her spine but she had one more topic to cover before she was willing to respond to the encouragement he was giving her body.

“Oliver,” she murmured, slowly losing focus, “in one week, promise me that we will sit down and reevaluate this entire situation. Just you and me.”  
“I promise,” he said in his quietest voice and moved closer to her, “In one week exactly, just you and me.”

Felicity sighed in relief. If this was the most he could offer, she would take it until he realized he needed to offer more. It was always a staged event with Oliver. He was stubborn to the point of frustration but he always saw her point in the end. It still hurt how he pushed her out of the bunker but that was something they could fix in time.

“Thank you for being patient with me,” he whispered into her ear, “I know I make things difficult and please know, I miss you in my ear every night.”

Blinking back tears, Felicity said, “I know, Oliver. I just wish…”  
“I trust you,” he insisted, cupping her face in his large hands, “I have always and will always trust you.”  
“I love you,” she whispered against his lips.  
“I love you,” he murmured as he gave himself over to her.

She kissed him softly but it wasn’t one of forgiveness, it was one that was meant to convey her commitment to him, to their relationship, to each other. His hands moved over her body, pulling her closer while he sought out her skin. His tongue crossed her lips and a low moan flowed out of her. Slipping her arms around him, she pressed herself against his body.

“Why are you naked?” she asked with a quiet chuckle.  
“Why are you not?” he mused, his lips silky hot on her neck.  
“Change it,” she challenged.

Oliver pushed himself up so that he could look down at her, his expression bemused and darkly erotic. Her breath caught in her throat as she watched the blue light that was filtering in through their bedroom window wash over his features. He was all angles and edges but she could see the gentleness in his eyes when he looked at her. It was the true Oliver radiating out and he was for her, only and always for her.

“You are so beautiful,” he mused while smoothing her hair back.  
“You should talk,” she smiled.  
“Never lock the bathroom door again,” he said, suddenly serious as he worked her tank top up and off her.  
“I needed to be alone,” she said quietly.  
“Just tell me,” his voice slightly muffled as he leaned low, his tongue licking a slow circle around her nipple. He was massaging her other breast in firm strokes, alternating pressure between the way he squeezed and sucked. She gasped when he pushed his other hand under the waistband of her flannel shorts and slid it between her legs.

“Oliver,” she panted as his thumb circled her clit, “how fast can you get my shorts off?”

He looked up at her, his eyes flashing in the dim light, “Watch.”

She hardly felt her pajama bottoms come off. He managed to lift her, pull them over her hips and fling them to the floor in a blink of an eye. Oliver paused, gazing down at her body, she felt the heat of his stare, the power and passion humming through his body as rested just a few inches above her. Reaching up, she stroked his cheek, tracing his lips with her thumb. His breathing was fast and full of heat.

“You are the universe in ecstatic motion,” he murmured.  
Felicity smiled, “You finally read that book of poetry by Rumi I gave you.”  
“I did. My favourite line is: ‘I want to know the joy of how you whisper "more”’,” he said in low and deep in his throat as he moved between her legs.  
“We’ll see if we get to that point,” she teased. His cock twitched against her thigh, growing harder with each passing second.  
“Felicity,” he said in mock seriousness, “you wound me.”  
“Oliver, less talk, please,” she responded as she pulled him into a deep, lover’s kiss.

Try as she might, all she could do was focus on the texture of his tongue and the way the head of his cock was rubbing against her clit. She pushed her hips up, feeling the solid shaft of his erect cock stroke down the length of her, growing hot and slick with each pass. All thoughts fled her mind as she ran her hands down his back, feeling the way his muscles bunched and flexed under her touch.

“Felicity,” he gasped as her threaded her fingers through his hair, “I only ever see you.”  
“Shhhh,” she whispered, pressing a kiss to his forehead, “I know.”

And she did. It never mattered how large a group or how great the distance between them, he filled her field of view as large as a mountain. He was her rock but he was also the one person, the only person, who could make her feel safe and protected with a simple glance. She could sense him in the darkest hours of the night, it was like he glowed for only her to find.

Oliver pressed his forehead to hers and then gently pushed inside her, slowly but firmly. Felicity gasped at the tension that this one simple movement generated between them. Some nights, when it was pure lust that drove them, she would cry out in ecstasy as he hurriedly thrust inside her. It was like all her senses were in overload, firing out of control. But sometimes, like tonight as their hearts sought to reconnect, it felt more intimate, more personal, like their bodies were joining together out of love and only love.

“You will always be Overwatch, you will always be my partner,” he spoke softly but clearly, “I promise you that, Felicity.”  
“Don’t get angry if I try and keep tabs on you anyways,” she murmured searching for his lips.  
“You wouldn’t be you if you didn’t,” he chuckled.

Felicity smiled and wrapped one leg up high around his waist but keeping the other one low, increasing the way her body squeezed down around him. It was ecstasy but more than that it was anchoring them together. He had his arms underneath her, cradling her as his hips picked up tempo and force. The sound of their bodies as they met in the frantic seconds leading up to her orgasm, was joyful and made her feel so alive.

Pulling him down to her, this time Oliver kissed her with a kind of tentative grace that broke her heart wide open. The fear of being left behind fled her body in a rush and she felt the way his heart connected to hers and finally how the love between them found a way to slip through the scars and cracks in their armour. As the tension in her pelvis increased, she felt the way he was trying to heal the wounds he created and, with a soft sigh, she welcomed it.

Wrapping her arms around him as best she could, she pressed her body into his and let her orgasm rip through her. It rolled over her in sustained waves, her body shuddered and bucked underneath him, her hips slamming into his with energy and force. Every time he thrust into her, her body responded. It pushed her into a grey area where she wasn’t sure where her pleasure began or ended. She felt like weeping as the ecstasy shifted to an exquisite, intimate joy.

“More,” she whispered in his ear.

Oliver needed no other encouragement. She felt his hand slip between them and his thumb began to stroke her clit in time to how he was moving his hips. She jerked and shuddered, trying to find a way to lessen the electric shocks he was creating from shooting through her body. It was like a lightning storm raging under her skin. She felt her bones rumble and watched the way his eyes lit up, swirling with light and life, and she let out a low, primal moan as her body drifted from her control.

Tears slid unnoticed down her cheeks as Oliver joined her in that gentle space between pleasure and pain. His cock throbbed inside her as she squeezed hard around him, feeling every twitch and spasm as he came in what she could feel was a long, hot stream. They laid locked together as their bodies slowly reclaimed the calm that always followed these intense couplings. But this time instead of their bodies seeking sleep, it felt like she was offering forgiveness.

“I guess we needed that,” he said with a soft laugh.  
“I will never not need that and you.”  
“I love you, Felicity. I never want you to think or feel like I don’t,” there was a longing and ache in his voice that was a loud as a shout.  
“One week?”  
“One week,” he agreed once more and kissed her, an intense kiss that claimed her heart and soul.

Slowly, Oliver moved his body off of hers, pulling her into his side as he did. She watched his muscles ripple and shift as he moved and felt the heat in her blood reignite. This time, it was about wanting him, not needing him. With just the barest of pressure, she ran her fingertips in a meandering line down the centre of his torso. She knew, given just a few minutes more, she could coax him back to life.

“Felicity,” he said drowsily, “I am played out.”  
“Are you sure?” she edged her fingertips lower, tracing the shark bite on his side.  
“...maybe.”  
“You don’t sound convinced,” she said as she pushed herself up, swinging her leg over his hips so that she could straddle him.

His hands moved to grasp her hips as she moved them in the circular motion against his flaccid cock. With a sly smile, she increased the pressure where their bodies met and felt the first surge of blood returning as he slowly hardened. He moaned, a mix of disbelief and pleasure, when she grasped him and stroked hard and firm until his erection took hold.

“Oliver?” she said softly, taking his hands in hers.  
“Hmmm?” he answered, mesmerized by the way she controlled him.  
“I am going to track you,” she said as she slid down his hard cock until he was deep inside her.  
“Felicity?” he gasped as she ground down on him, moving in one direction and then another.  
“Hmmmm?” she answered, mesmerized by the way he felt as he rolled his hips slowly to match her rhythm.  
“More.”

Her mind went to a quiet, blank space where all that mattered was the two of them and the way their bodies felt locked together. They had managed to find a secret place in the violent world that surrounded them. They laid claim to it with the beauty they managed to create everytime they spoke truth to their lives and love. She always felt a peaceful joy when the doors were open between them.

Now, as they rocked their bodies together, she thought of all the times they had broken each other’s hearts. How each time the pain was deeper, more keenly felt. But now, she felt her heart open once and for all.

“So this is what forever feels like…,” she murmured as she looked down at Oliver.  
“I will always find you…,” he sighed as he tenderly cupped her face in his battle hardened hands.

They were in no rush now, all the frantic need to _feel_ had been met, now it was about something deeply held in the bond between them. Felicity hooked her feet under Oliver’s powerful thighs and slowed her movements to a pulsing crawl. She wanted to feel every shudder, every twitch, every single movement he made. A thin line of sweat ran down her back as she laboured to keep control of not just her body but his as well.

His breathing was growing shorter and deeper. He grasped her hips, trying to encourage her to move faster, harder against him. Somehow, she managed to keep their shared rhythm to what she wanted and watched as the way her body moved around his cock was affecting him. She felt her orgasm building and knew she would come before him.

Still, she kept her movements slow and deliberate, keeping her pleasure at bay. She wanted him to watch and feel her as she moved them both towards their shared ecstasy. Her body flexed forward of its own accord, betraying her intent to make this last, she wanted to reach for him but his hips rocketed up against her. It was all either of them needed.

She let her head fall back and heard the exhalation of breath as he rapidly lost control of his body’s need to release the energy it was holding onto. Gripping his hands, Felicity thrust hard against him until she felt the rush of heat in her pelvis explode outwards and watched as stars burst into life around them.

The wave of ecstasy she rode seemed endless. She could faintly hear him whispering her name over and over, telling her he loved her with a tenderness reserved only for this shared moment, as his hands gripped her hips. A groan burst out of him and she felt him explode deep inside her.

“Oh God, Oliver,” she gasped, “that was…”  
“Better than more,” he finished for her.

As gracefully as she could, she laid back down on the bed beside Oliver. With a deep, satisfied sigh, she laid her head on his chest and let her body relax. He pressed a kiss into the top of her head and pulled her close. They spent a few minutes in silence, catching their breath and listening to the rain as it fell hard against their bedroom window.

“Oliver,” she said softly, “I think I need another shower.”

He softly laughed and said, “I think I do, too.”  
“Oh, we should not have one at the same time,” she laughed.  
“But the environment!” he chuckled.  
“Well, we could but then we would have to try.”

Oliver laughed louder this time and got up, picking his discarded towel up as he did so. “I think we should stagger them. Come and join me in 3 minutes.”  
“That is oddly specific.”  
“3 minutes, Felicity.”

She laughed and watched him go in the dim light. It was probably for the best that they did this separately given the way the night had gone but she enjoyed the ritual of him washing her clean. With a yawn and quick glance at the clock, she was surprised to see it was not yet midnight and climbed out of bed. She left her pajamas on the floor at the foot of the bed and went in to join Oliver.

Five minutes later, warm and dry, they were back in bed. Felicity turned on her side, waiting for Oliver to pull in behind her. She loved the weight of his arm over her body and they way his chest would press into her back as he breathed. She felt like they were weaving a spell over each other in the quiet room.

They talked softly about William and his plans to see his grandparents during summer vacation. It was important for him to see Samantha’s family, to keep that relationship strong. Oliver suggested they have a date night during the week and she readily agreed. They didn’t often get a chance to just enjoy each other’s company and a married date sounded perfect to her ears.

Felicity snuggled into the bed, against him and tried to push the growing dread from her mind. Oliver had promised that he would always come back but she could feel that there was something coming, something bigger than either of them could counter, that would rip their world apart. Fear was slowly wrapping itself around her heart but she made herself focus on the rise and fall of Oliver’s chest as he fell into a deep sleep.

As she let herself chase the darkness of sleep, she pulled Oliver’s hand to rest over her heart. She had loved him enough to dismantle the barriers she had built to protect her heart from breaking. Oliver was the greatest love she would ever know. It felt eternal to her and with every shared breath, the very idea that he could be snatched from her life with no warning meant every moment together was one to be celebrated.

_Her dream that night was of a field out beyond the edge of the earth. The tall grasses shifted in the breeze, revealing the path to the meadow full of wildflowers. She could smell roses, daisies, lavender and something spicy, like rosemary. She didn’t need to see him to know Oliver was there, waiting for her to join him. Even in this impossible place, their love was the bridge that connected them._


End file.
